Old Journal Entries: Vol. IV

Journal Entry: 7/4/2007 “In My Own Company”

I feel like I’m much more insightful by myself.  I have a better understanding of people and the world when I’m alone.  I have a better understanding of who I am.

When I’m by myself, out running, riding in the mountains, driving for miles in solitude, I feel like I know me.  I get around others and I’m not sure what I’m supposed to be.  I want that to change.

Tonight Lace asked me what type of personality I have, whether I’m better in groups, or one on one.  I don’t know.  I rarely spend time alone with one other person.  It made me wonder how I would be on a date.  Am I the kind of person that someone would just want to get away from, or could I actually communicate on a meaningful level?

I feel the main draw or appeal of a one on one relationship, as shared by a boyfriend and girlfriend, is that you’re aware that this one other person finds you fascinating.  Man!  Wouldn’t that be neat?  To know that at least one other person thinks that you are more interesting than all the other people?  I can hardly wait!